It’s finally done. And only six days late!

It all started last week, when I had to re-learn how to make a zine. I hadn’t made one since college.This was the Wednesday before last, when the iPad was getting announced. It felt real weird to be doing the most rudimentary practice of media distribution, while thousands of miles away, the “future” of it was being unveiled.

Prototypes. I did a shitty layout, then sent it over to Jen who typeset it beautifully. And for free! Big heart on that O’Malley.

It came time to print and I was having major issues. Printer was claiming I hadn’t loaded the paper properly or there wasn’t enough paper when I told it, repeatedly, that this was not the case. I contacted Epson, who was no help. I was having nightmares of having to take this thing into Kinko’s. Then I saw this red button. And what do you do to a red button? You press it. And the printer started working. That’s all she wanted, just to know that I was there, that I hadn’t forgotten about her. This is apparently the reassurance button.

And BOOM! You got yurself a zine. Not long after this photo was taken I did an email with The Cambodian Daily about this project. No joke. First bit of international press! Oh, and Yahoo users: did you know about this?

Festive table of contents.

Very happy with this one. Oh yeah, did I mention…

Red staples. It’s called attention to detail, people. Maybe you should look into it (this hubris does not apply to typos).

This zine’s dancing with talent!

Did I mention that we’re only print 100 of them and that orders are shipping now? Click here to buy!

What showed up in this unassuming envelope with the sick lightning-bolt-heavy-metal handwriting that looks more at home on a high school notebook cover?

The new Caketrain! Can’t wait to read it. How insane is that Cure All cover, btw? Looks like someone’s got a BBCDW coming their way.

We’re slacking a bit on this. I’m not entirely sure why I decided to have a deadline coincide with the printing of a zine. Guess I’m just ambitious and stupid like that.

If you are extremely eager to get your hands on this you can pre-order here.

Might not be a bad idea to pre order, seeing as 1) it’s for a good cause 2) it’s got a pretty serious roster 3) Two words: limited edish. We’re only printing 100 of them.

We’re shipping this Thursday, when we’ll also have a more in-depth blog post/press release/big hooplah about it. Anybody know where I can get my hands on a saddle stapler besides Kinko’s?

The deadline for our sacrifice themed issue has passed. Much like the science report in high school that you forgot about until the night before it was due, many of you waited until the last minute to submit work. I respect your eagerness to be published. Thanks to everyone who submitted. You’re efforts will not go unrecognized. I am recognizing them. Right here. Consider this recognition.

Now I have to go read 150 short stories in eight hours.

Attended the Publishing in the Age of Blah, Blah, Blah event at Mellville House last night. Pictured from left to right: Lev Grossman, Dennis Loy Johnson, Joe Meno, Sarah Manguso, Heidi Julavits and Myla Goldberg. Not pictured: John Wray, Tao Lin, and Joshua Henkin.

The question of e-books and online publishing has, thus far, been primarily discussed with editors and publishers. But what about the people writing the books? No one seems to be giving a shit what they think about any of this. Why don’t we ask them?

And with that, a panel discussion was born.

I didn’t take any notes, nor did I snap any photos except for the one above (was a little gun-shy as it was a somewhat formal event and I didn’t want to be that weird, scene report, blogger dude, but apparently that’s what I’m becoming), but here’s what I got out of the discussion: e-books and online publishing will not, nor should they, effect the author whatsoever.

Joe brought up an interesting point that if you’re a writer, why wouldn’t you want any possible avenue of distribution at your disposal?

E-books and online publishing is an area of frustration and panic for editors and publishers because it’s strange and new, two concepts that seem to scare them. And it maybe has the potential to fuck with their wallets. Writers make money off of book sales, print or electronic.  But here’s why it’s not going to effect them whatsoever: out of eight authors on the panel only one of them professed to make a full time living off of their novel writing.

Some of your favorite authors, really successful and talented ones, have supplemental income. Teaching, editing, copy writing, janitor, whatever. You know this. Writing’s never been a gold rush industry (though with the amount of people trying to write these days, you could have fooled me). And this was where the night got a little depressing. This panel of critically acclaimed, award winning authors came flat out and said that they weren’t making a livable income off their books.If they can’t do it, what hope is there for us?

But there was also an interesting discussion point brought up that the writer needs to be industrious and entrepreneurial, to be experimental with ways of getting their work out to people. John Wray went served as the “opening act” for Colson Whitehead on his last book tour. And for another book tour he proposed to his publisher that he ride a raft down the Mississippi River.

I used to think that now that the old publishing model was broken people were struggling to find the new one. But I don’t think that anymore.

Our age won’t be defined by finding a new model to operate from. We are the age of constant flux. The age of uncertainty, like jumping form one cracking iceberg to the next, we are surviving, taking chances. Very scary, but also very exciting.

Random notes:

Two separate mentions of the word “codify” were used by two separate people on two separate topics of discussion.

I introduced myself to Tao Lin to make sure there was no bad blood over a recent blog post of mine. He punched me in the face.

Actually, he said he liked the post and I gave him a magazine.

Holy shit, did you know that the deadline for our first themed issue is this Sunday?!? It’s true. If you want to be in the print issue this time around you’d better get your stuff in soon. For the month of February and March we will be reading for online stories only. The shortlist is growing and there’s some impressive names on there as is, so quit monkeyin’ around and send in your A+ material. Today!

Random thoughts:

Last Sunday night I rode the L train out to meet David Peak at his house. I texted him beforehand to get his address. He texted it back to me and also wrote It’s a little dirty in the hood, just to warn you. David lives in a neighborhood that straddles Brooklyn and Queens. A hairy neighborhood apparently, one that’s getting its first trickling of gentrification. I got off the train, the furthest I’ve ever been on the L. It was quiet on a Sunday night, all the storefronts with their metal shutters drawn closed, as if in preparation for a hurricane. The few people on the street were either walking to or from work. There were even fewer white people. I walked past a trio of white women and we made eye contact with each other as if to say “What are you doing here?” In his building there was a baby crying that you could hear from every floor. Across the street was a gang of stray cats. It was an apt preface to reading David’s chapbook.

This book is about being a young white man living in a fucked up city. Or at least, living in a fucked up part of the city. David collects images of decay, of cruelty, of insanity, and shows them to you, not to force you into guilt or pity, but to get you to recognize that we live in a fucked up world, and that you’re a fool if you ever forget that.

Excerpt:

Economy

I read in a magazine that you’re never supposed to give pets away for free on Craigslist. You’re always supposed to charge money, like forty dollars minimum for a cat, or maybe more for a dog. A person interested in killing animals for pleasure would never pay forty dollars.

Google imaging “Museum of Fucked” brings up some unsettling pictures.

Head over to HTMLGIANT where the results for the “When Writers Get Off” contest have been announced. Congrats to Chris Killen for having the most depraved brain.

Went to the Rumpus/HTMLgiant thing last night. It was at this kinda fancy place on the boarder of Chinatown and LES. I said hello to Stephen. I went to shake his hand and he offered me a hug. He said he linked us yesterday. I said he was correct and I thanked him. Then I said it was good to see him and I walked away. He started speaking and then asked everyone to sit on the floor.

So we did.

This is the lady who runs the NY end of things on the Rumpus. She was wearing an amazing dress but she was very uncomfortable in front of the microphone.

This is Justin Taylor. It’s very strange seeing people, who are previously known to you only over the internet, in real life. This was an entire night of these encounters.

Tao Lin. Same could be said for people whose books you’ve read. He quit halfway through cause his throat was bugging him.

This girl sang Niko Case songs. I looked over and Tao Lin was asleep awake.

This is a terrible shot of Deb Olin Unferth.

This is a not-as-terrible-but-still-unsatisfactory shot of Deb Olin Unferth. Which is unfortunate, because I love Deb Olin Unferth.

It was in a very strange bar/restaurant place where they decided to put the stage at the top of the stairs. Which meant if you wanted to go get a drink you were out of luck if the show started up when you tried to get back to your place, and you were forced to watch strange images projected onto the wall of the bar and imagine they were accompanying the stories being told.

Tao Lin, Alina Simone and Stephen Elliot read a transcript of a facebook chat she had with a complete stranger.

And then there was Jeff Lewis. Who I used to not like, but then respected him quite a bit more after seeing him live.

He did an illustrated, A cappella song explaining the Cuban Missile Crisis. So… lifelong fan. He hit the nail on the head when he said he’d never played a gig where he’d acted as goalkeep by keeping people from getting their drinks at the bar.

Also, I met David Peak and Greg Gerke in real life. They are cool dudes.

Definitely worth the five bucks but it was a very strange night. I was expecting a more spirited celebration like the last Rumpus event I went to. It was at times a regular old reading, at times exciting and funny. Overall, I was more excited to see my internet friends in real life. Readings in New York should never, ever, be boring. There was one girl who sighed through her reading. If you are not excited about your work, what makes you think I will be?

?

Annalemma and HTMLgiant are hopping into the sack together for a contest. Taking yesterday’s When Author’s Get Hungry contest, we decided to throw When Author’s Get Off. Go over to the Giant and turn your favorite book title into something ribald, titillating or downright pornographic. Winner gets an Annalemma Bundle. Contest ends tomorrow afternoon. And better bring your A-game, I’m already laughing my ass off.

Also we will be putting out the call for submissions for a collaborative piece named after the winning title.

Thanks to Jimmy Chen for getting the ball rolling!